According to Brené Brown, the only way to live a meaningful life is by embracing genuine connection with others. And the only way to achieve meaningful connection is through the painful, often uncomfortable vulnerability that makes honesty, empathy, and compassion possible.
With that in mind… cue my long post.
My cousin and I recently shared our last “geriatric” pregnancies together, each carrying what we knew would be our final babies. But while we were pregnant at the same time, she was on a very different journey. She was diagnosed with breast cancer, and had her first mastectomy while still pregnant.
I was watching the strongest mama I knew, stronger than I was, even as just a bystander. I was overwhelmed thinking about how she must have felt and the fear she must have carried. I was scared for my cousin… and for baby Dia.
I watched, I listened, I cried, and I prayed. She spoke a lot of medical terms that didn’t make much sense at the time, but I took in as much as I could to support her.
Her willingness to share her journey may have saved my life.
Who knew I would eventually need to understand those same terms myself? Life was emotionally preparing me for what would become my own reality.
🔎 The IMPORTANT Part
Because of our family history, she underwent advanced screenings. Her mammogram came back normal. Her ultrasound came back normal.
It wasn’t until her MRI that her breast cancer was detected.
I share some of that same family history, and extreme breast density. So I knew I’d need to push for the same advanced screening in the future.
I spaced out my screenings across the year:
📅 Mammogram
📅 Ultrasound
📅 And then, I showed up for my MRI.
But they told me it was canceled.
Insurance had denied it.
They said it wasn’t “medically necessary.”
💥 Advocate Like a Mama
I’ve spent the last decade advocating for my son. That experience taught me how to go to battle for something that matters. So I pushed. Hard.
I advocated for myself, but more than that, I did it for my children.
It wasn’t until I reminded myself:
In order to show up for my children, I have to prioritize my own health.
Eventually, the MRI was approved and rescheduled. And they found something “suspicious.”
The biopsy came back positive for breast cancer.
I am now a future breast cancer survivor.
🗓 The Road Ahead
On September 26th, I will undergo a bilateral mastectomy.
At a routine pre op mammogram just last Friday, they found two additional clusters of calcification. We won’t know the final staging or treatment plan until pathology results come back after surgery. But no matter what they show, I’m walking in prepared, with clarity, peace, and strength.
✨ What This Journey Is Teaching Me
- You can be scared and strong at the same time.
- You can fight like hell and still need help.
- And sometimes, your life depends not on luck, but on persistence.
I don’t know what’s next. But I do know this:
🧬 I will meet with the oncology team and determine what, if any, further treatment is needed.
💉 I’ll ask about genetic testing for DPD deficiency, which impacts how some medications are processed.
💪 I’ll show up with trust in the team I’ve chosen and the body that’s still fighting for me.
Then, I’ll move forward.
I’ll complete the reconstruction surgeries.
I’ll stay vigilant.
I’ll stay grateful.
And I’ll stay alive.
💛 I’m Not Just Surviving. I’m Creating a Legacy.
One day, I’ll look back and realize that the fear wasn’t as scary as it felt in the moment. That the pain became a memory. That the grief didn’t erase the joy.
What will remain is the love I felt from those around me.
The strength I found within myself.
And the example I set for my family.
To advocate fiercely.
To live fully.
To connect bravely.
Because I’m not just surviving this.
I’m becoming someone new.
I’m becoming a future survivor.
We are made from grit.
